I look forward to Saturdays, the day I get to deliver papers with the boys.  D and P have a way of making me laugh and laughter with the ones you love is a good thing.  This particular Saturday had its share of moments and adventures.

As usual, we had a lot of routes today.  One of them was completely new to me and I didn’t have a clue where I was supposed to be delivering.  Not having GPS or even a map, I did what I normally do – I stopped and asked for directions.  Today, there were fireman collecting at grocery stores to stamp out hunger.  I figured a fireman would be a good person to ask.  Turns out two of the three fireman didn’t know where the drive I was searching for was.  They’re pretty dependent on GPS it seems.  Heaven help a little out of the way street if GPS for some reason fails.  But GPS never fails right?

Wrong.  Later in the day, I found myself with a flat tire.  This surprised me because it was only two weeks ago that I had a flat on the other side.  I turned to my good friends at CAA for assistance and they speedily came to my rescue.  The first time I had a flat, the assistant could not get my spare tire to come down.  Dodge Caravans have a terrible spare tire design that just doesn’t work for the Canadian climate.  Fortunately, that time Mr. CAA was able to inflate the tire and send me on my way to Walmart where no leak could be found.  An explanation was given for this phenomena and I was sent out the door owing nothing.  Isn’t it great when it works out like that?

This time around, inflating the tire didn’t work nearly as well.  This particular tire had a hole in it and needed to be either replaced or repaired.  I had a different CAA fellow and warned him that he likely wouldn’t be able to get my spare tire down.  He tried unbelievably hard to get that mechanism to release the needed captive tire but to no avail.  He went so far as to lay on his back and double kick the thing and then take a hammer and clang on with some force but it proved impenetrable.  The only other option was to get towed.  As soon as I got in the CAA truck, I could see why the fellow had tried so hard to get at the spare.  His boss had decided that morning to put not one, not two, but three brand new air fresheners in the truck.  It was like someone had doused the cab in cheap cologne.  Even though it was below zero, we drove with the windows open just so we could breathe.  The poor guy apologized over and over again for the not so sweet aroma we were swimming in.  Despite the odorifous haze, I noted that the CAA truck didn’t have GPS.  Turns out two had already burnt out and the guy was awaiting investigation before purchasing another.  So those nifty things can fail.  My guess is that they’re smell sensitive.  Not much functions well in cheap cologne fog.

Things got funnier when we pulled into the first garage and the attendant told us in all seriousness that he thought he might be able to fit us in on Wednesday.  CAA guy just looked at him with incredulity and then said, “Ummm, we’ll just tow it somewhere else.”  Back into the smell mobile we piled and headed out across town to garage #2.  This one was more accommodating.  We had to wait but they would get us in and fixed up.  The wait proved to be pretty tough.  There were no magazines in the waiting area, just a TV blaring ultimate fighting.  The guy and gal in there seemed pretty absorbed with the show but watching two grown men covered in tatoos pummeling each other isn’t really my idea of entertainment.  All I could think of was what kind of mothers produced sons that became ultimate fighting machines.  Scary thought.  Turning to watch my vehicle being hoisted up and examined wasn’t a whole lot more interesting.  Mr. Garage Man must have saw something akin to boredom on my face because suddenly he was my best friend, chatting on and on about everything including the length of my son’s hair (we were on our way to get it cut when we got the flat), tatoos, body piercings and his best parental advice from years of experience.  Somehow he didn’t register that I wasn’t terribly interested or maybe I’m just good at faking small talk with complete strangers who want to give me advice from years of experience.  Thankfully, the repair didn’t take too long or cost too much.  Not so thankfully, the only shop where D will get his hair cut (did I mention he’s a teen now?) was closed by the time the tire ordeal was over and so D still has that long, shaggy look that gets complete strangers commenting to me about it.

So if you can’t get your hair cut go to the pet shop and get ready to buy a ball python, right?  If it’s Saturday and you’re part of our family that’s the next logical step.  P’s now got the tank, figured out how to heat it, has it lined with shavings snakes are particularly fond of  and figures he’ll have enough money by next week to actually buy a baby snake.  Oh joy!

I failed to mention that the boys taught me a new game today.  We punch each other when we see Volkswagen Beetles and now we blurt out “Yellow car” whenever we see, you guessed it, a yellow car.  I got pretty good at being the first to blurt.  Trouble is I didn’t turn the blurting off in the tow truck.  I saw a yellow car, called out loudly and clearly “Yellow car” and then saw the CAA fellow give me that “you’re kind of weird” look.  It was actually quite funny (to me, at least).

O.K. Enough with the funny moments of the day.  I did make it home and did get some work done and now have some pictures of P’s greatly improved bedroom.  Bear in mind that these were taken in the evening in low light without flash and therefore the colour looks a little more golden than they do in real life.  Other than that, enjoy the improvements.

Advertisements